I hate feeling so... So... Pathetic. I always get to a certain point of recovery till everything breaks again. I can hardly Stand feeling weak. People think I do not hear their whispers, they are wrong I know what they think of me. They are wrong, it is that simple. I do well at school putting on a smile. I hate when people ask me what's wrong because as long as I keep things to myself, I can do okay pretending that I am okay. A lot of it is my fault. I have given up, almost. I have almost got the point where I am asking myself what the point is of trying when people are going to think what they want anyhow. As strong as I want to be, I can't seem to get there. I just breakdown... Then I get mad at my self for letting it get to me. I am too young to feel tired all the time. I feel like leaving but I know I can't... I have to be "strong" and stay for the little boys. They need us, more than I need out. But oh God j need your help. Urey to do things on my own but I am utterly hopeless without Him. I will post again later maybe.. Sorry for all the errors again, I am typing this on my phone on my way to church. Before I go will you please pray for me? Love you guys have a great night.
XOXO Hannah Shiloh
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